Phyllis: Single Career-Oriented Mom.
Rich: Divorced Self Employed Father of 2, Joint custodial parent.
We both had existing ads running on AS. I was about to cancel my membership before leaving for a much needed trip to Florida and I hadn't seen much of what I was looking for. I changed my viewing preferences one last time by editing the age group. I believe I saw Rich's ad on the last day of the membership, so I sent him a quick hello. He got back to me that evening via email. I told him about my trip to Florida and that we could chat when I returned. I did leave him my cell phone number. I found several text messages when I got to Florida...from Rich. I wasn't one to text, but he said he enjoyed our short emails and wanted to say "hey" anyway. When I got back, Rich sent me an email about a person he'd been seeing. He said it wasn't serious and that he did want to meet me. We arranged a meeting at a Sushi Nightclub.
The night was stormy and I could barely see out my window. I got to the club a little late (on purpose) and was very nervous. It was pouring and I thought I'd be soaked before I even made it to the door. I called Rich and told him I was outside having second thoughts. He urged me to come inside. I finally got up the nerve to go in. He was a really nice looking guy, whose clothes needed major updating, but nothing I couldn't conquer. He seemed genuinely interested, so we made the best of dining, drinking, and dancing.
For the most part, we became good friends, and then great partners. Our kids got along (a major hurdle) and each of our kids liked both of us. As things progressed we decided to sell his home, and move into mine as it was bigger, and closer to his work. We'd discussed marriage about a year into dating, but decided it would be best to get the houses situated first. It was a fairly easy transaction, and the rest is history. We were wed 2 years and one month after we met on AmericanSingles.
A dating rule of mine: Never give up hope. I had a toddler at home, was not into the bar scene, was already 45 years old, and didn't want to pay sitters for lousy meetings. I really sifted through a lot of ads and made smart decisions about which guys to meet. It was best to always be honest and ask the right questions. One, for your safety, but mostly, to see if you're compatible. A couple of vital questions I had were: when was the last time they had a conversation with their parents, or what did their kids have for dinner the night before, or were they texting and emailing old friends all the time? The answers give inside clues to the person. There are so many ways to learn about someone by just asking good questions about the important things in life. Not how tall they are or what kind of car they drive. That stuff comes later and isn't so important in the long run.
Phyllis and Rich